Who Gets the Glory
Yesterday as the girls and I were on our way to Costco, I told them, "Let's get the makings for more homeless bags to pass out." Our homeless bags were inspired by a friend who did something similar and seemed to me the perfect solution to the dilema I always feel when approached for money. I almost always say "No" reasoning that the money most often goes toward furthering an addiction of one sort or another. However, it is so difficult to say "No" to someone who might genuinely be in need, and I certainly do not want my children to grow up devoid of compassion for those needing a hand. So now we carry around in our car a couple of large zip lock bags that each contain water, several non-perishable food items, and a gospel tract. In my newer additions I also want to add a map to the Redwood Gospel Mission along with some Bible verse cards. It has been satisfying to follow up my "No" with "but I do have some food for you if you'd like."
We had used up our bags and were needing to make more. Before we stopped at Costco though I ran in to Cash & Carry. On the way out I was approached by a woman who asked for money. Too bad she wasn't waiting outside of Costco for me, I would have been much better prepared. But as much as I wanted to just tell her "No" or give her some money and hope she used it wisely, I instead told her, "I don't want to give you any money, but I will buy you some food if you'd like." She seemed grateful so I locked up my car again and returned into Cash & Carry. It is a restaurant warehouse and an unlikely place to find a quick individual meal for someone. After scouring several aisles, I settled for a large pack of string cheese, a big bag of oranges and a case of V-8 Splash bottles. As I walked up to the only cashier, he recognized me as the woman who had just been through his line 10 minutes earlier. "You're back!" he said with a friendly smile.
"Well," I explained, "there was a woman outside who wanted money and I didn't want to give her money so I came in to buy her some food."
He was immediately impressed and told me what a great thing that was. Then he told me some stories about how he'd shared his lunch with homeless folks before. As I was leaving he told me, "Well Karma's on your side now."
I smiled and said, "I don't know about that." And then I left. The lady was still waiting for me so I loaded her up with cheese, oranges, and a couple of bottles of V-8 Splash. She thanked me and we parted ways.
Afterward I looked back with immense dissatisfaction on the whole thing. On the one hand, it is proof of God's work in my life that I would trouble myself to help this woman because I am not a person who naturally oozes either mercy or generosity. However, WHO got the glory?
I wish I had told that pleasant cashier that Karma had nothing to do with my actions -- I'm not even sure what Karma is, it always brings to mind the bumper sticker that reads, "My karma just ran over your dogma"--but it had everything to do with the fact that Jesus Christ has changed my life and because of that I want to obey Him in caring for the "least of these". I also wish I had invited him to church and given him a gospel tract so he could know more. Instead I left him with the impression that I was just a good person with Karma on my side. What a missed opportunity.
I wish that I had given the waiting woman more than food. I wish I had told her that Jesus Christ loves her. I wish that I had applied 1 Peter 3:15 which says, ... Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have.
I've always thought of that verse in terms of appologetics - defending the gospel - but I think it is vital to apply when others observe God working in your life. What is the point of being a light if I don't tell the source of the light. I can honestly say that I was trying to honor the Lord as I cared about this woman, it was in obedience to Him that I did it. But WHO got the glory?
Last night I started packing our new bags. We'll be working on those finishing touches tomorrow -- our rescue mission map, our gospel tract & verse cards AND some fancy chocolate truffles. I am convicted though that just as much I need to PREPARE an answer for everyone who may ask me to give the reason for the hope I have. If no one is pointed toward the One who can give lasting hope and answers, then what is really gained? I don't want to squander the opportunities God gives to direct the glory right back to Him!